Liam’s Birth Story

It was Monday January 20th, 2020 at 3:30 am when I woke up because I felt a warm, but small gush of liquid. I honestly thought maybe it was just discharge since my mucus plug had started to come out the week prior. I hadn’t thought anything of it then, but when I mentioned it to my mom she said that when her mucus plug fell out she went into labor 5 days later! I didn’t want to believe that I was going into labor anytime soon, I was only 37 weeks and baby boy needed to keep cooking so that I could have more time to prepare his nursery, which I spent a fair amount of time organizing the night before (wonder if this “physical activity” had anything to do with my water breaking). Either way, mother’s intuition is always right, I should’ve believed her haha

When I got up to go to the bathroom I knew it wasn’t discharge because it was a completely clear liquid and I knew it wasn’t pee because as I sat on the toilet I emptied my entire bladder. By this time my underwear had been soaked through, so I changed underwear, put on a pad and laid back in bed. The liquid kept coming out in small gushes, so I texted my mom who was back in FL, and not supposed to fly out until the 30th, that I was certain my water had broken. Her immediate response was “Wow!” and as I sat on the toilet I browsed flights to see if she could make it in same-day. As I soaked through a second pair of underwear I texted my doula to give her the heads up and see how we should proceed. Between all the getting up to go to the bathroom, changing underwear and the bright LED screen of my phone as I texted immediate family, I had woken up Travis and told him the news. “Are you serious?” were the first words that came out of his groggy mouth, he immediately got up and started packing his hospital bag (which should’ve been ready and in the car, but I’ll cut him some slack because I like to be over-prepared and had my bag and the baby’s ready to go in the car the week before.) Luckily, Trav had figured out how to install the carseat the previous day after church so there wasn’t much left to get together for the hospital.

Once my doula got back to me she asked me to call my midwife and see if they wanted me to come in. It was around 6 am by then, but I still wasn't feeling any contractions so I didn't feeling too rushed or concerned. When the clinic opened at 9 am they transferred me to the midwife on-call at the hospital, Cami Bearnson CNM, who asked me to come in. Travis and I showered, got ready, ate cereal and made a pit-stop to Smith’s for drinks and some adult diapers before making our way to American Fork Hospital. Once on the L&D floor they tested my pH and confirmed my water had indeed broken and checked me in— we couldn’t believe it, our baby was going to be born today! On our way to the rooms I told them I was going natural and the nurses were so excited for me they gave me the largest room on the floor with a panoramic view of the mountains, it was beautiful! I felt so spoiled by the nurses, they were all great throughout our stay and during the birthing process.

With time my sister came over and so did Mitzi, my doula, both whom smuggled me in some snacks because I was still hungry and hospital policy was that I could only eat clear liquids for fear of aspiration if an emergency c-section was necessary. But I’m a rebel and knew that this was a marathon, not a race, and that I needed to fuel my body for what was to come ;P After several hours the midwife checked me, but I was still not dilated past 1 cm! I tried walking, sitting on a yoga ball, nipple stimulation, but still no progress. By this time it was noon and the midwife was recommending I start a drop of pitocin to get things going, but I was getting really nervous and dreading it because of all the horror stories I’ve heard related to pitocin and expectant mothers begging for an epidural afterwards which would thrash my goal to go natural.

In the meantime, my mom was already on a plane making her way to SLC (luckily they waived the transfer fee when I told them she had to reschedule because I went into labor early— thank you American Airlines!), so I was also prolonging the pitocin as long as I could to buy her time because I really wanted her to be there. After hours and still no progress past 1 cm, I eventually agreed to the pitocin at around 5pm and also got a round of antibiotics because I had tested GBS+ (Group B-Streptococcus) and this would avoid the baby getting an infection while passing through the birth canal. My mother-in-law Debbie soon joined the party and so did my best friend Nathaly once they were off work, it was so great to be surrounded and supported by all the most important women in my life.

After an hour or so my sister headed to the airport to pick up my mom whose flight was landing at 7 pm. The contractions were actually getting strong enough for me to feel discomfort, earlier I was having contractions according to the machine, but would literally not even know it was happening. As time progressed the contractions were beginning to be unbearable. I was clinging to Travis and nearly breaking his hands, I was squeezing so hard, lol! It eventually got to the point where no matter what position I was in I couldn’t find any relief and I had a really strong feeling like I was going to poop, so I headed over to the bathroom to sit on the toilet just incase. In between one of the contractions the midwife checked me again and I was finally dilated and to 7 cm! This was exciting and great news and it felt like the beginning of the end. While on the toilet it felt best to moan in low tones to deal with the pain, it worked and helped me cope for a little bit, but the pain was only intensifying with each contraction so I decided to get back on the hospital bed and lay on my side, stand on all fours, hang over the back of the bed, but nothing really gave me true relief besides pushing when the contraction would come, it’s what felt most natural. (I guess that was my body’s way of saying “Get this thing out of me!” hahaha)

Travis and my doula were such incredible supports to me during these strong waves. They’d push on different pressure points to open up my pelvis and relieve the pressure, Mitzi would rub my back and put her hand on my forehead and I would just let my head sink into her hand. Even though none of this took the pain away it was comforting to feel their physical and emotional support around me. There were moments I almost wanted to cry the pain was so bad, but I didn’t let myself knowing it wouldn’t do any good and if anything make me tense up and feel worse. As labor progressed I pushed with more intensity during each wave, I was certain I was going to poop my pants, but it was really just the pressure of the babies head I was feeling so intensely!

Soon enough the midwife asked me to reach down and feel the baby’s dark curly hair— he was crowning! His head felt like a soft squishy chunk of play-doh covered in fuzz and I immediately asked for a mirror so I could see him emerging. They rolled in a tall mirror on wheels that tilted so I could see him from the perfect angle. Seeing his head peek through gave me so much strength and motivation, I could finally see the light at the end of the tunnel, our baby was almost here! The midwife was so great at encouraging me with each push and I could feel the notorious “ring of fire” from the babies head stretching and pushing his way through the vaginal opening. Travis soon saw my sister’s car pulling into the parking lot and waved at her and my mom to hurry! Next thing I knew they were in the room and a wave of relief came over me knowing my mom had arrived at just the perfect time to see her grandson be born. Travis was at my right side holding a cool rag on my forehead, an oxygen mask on my face (nurses said my O2 was dropping from the pushing) and cheering me on with each push, “I see him! You’re so close babe! Keep pushing!" On the left was my mom, the woman who gave me life witnessing it all, tears in her eyes. Suddenly, I saw the midwife prepping some sort of plastic bag and other materials at the foot of the bed, I knew we were reaching the finish line soon. She coached me on my next and last big push and it was an instant feeling of relief as the babies head and body slipped out with ease and she held him up so we could see him for the very first time.

(Also thank goodness for the bright lights conveniently censoring these photos LOL)

By then everyone in the room was in tears, except me oddly, my immediate reaction was that of complete and total relief now that the contractions were gone and because of all the adrenaline I was on something like a runner’s high knowing I had achieved my ultimate birthing goal— to bring our baby safely into the world without an epidural! They placed him on my chest for skin-to-skin and a couple minutes later, after I delivered the placenta, Travis cut the cord (we did delayed chord clamping).

Liam James Roberts was born on January 20th, 2020 weighing 6 lb 5 oz and measuring 20 inches. He had dark curly hair at first with all the birthing goop, blue-grey eyes and thick berry lips like his momma.

Immediately after birthing him I had crazy chills all over my body and couldn’t stop shaking from the loss of blood and adrenaline. I had a second degree tear that the midwife immediately stitched-up as we did skin-to-skin and once they were done they took him over to the baby station to measure and weigh him. They gave me a couple pre-warmed blankets which were amazing (like when you put on a shirt that just came out of the dryer), my whole body felt exhausted— my legs were fatigued from holding them spread-eagle, my back between my shoulder blades was soar from using my back muscles to push and my face and eyes had several burst blood vessels from all the exertion (didn’t even know that was possible). Even though I felt like I just came out of a fight, I was feeling like I could just take over the world. That feeling lasted several days after having the baby, I just feelt completely unstoppable and like I could overcome and do ANYTHING I set my mind to!

When everything settled down and all the babies vitals were taken they gave me a menu so that Travis and I could order food, I ordered a cheeseburger with everything on it and an oreo milkshake, it was the BEST reward after all that hard work.

They moved us to a smaller room downstairs and the nurses came in to introduce themselves and give us a ton of random information, safety protocols for the baby, paperwork, etc. By the time they were done with their spiel it was 3 am and 24 hrs since my water broke and we finally went to sleep.

The next two days were followed by nurses coming in every two hours to check vital signs on me and baby, push on my abdomen (which was so painful), make sure my bleeding was doing well and do some teaching (newborn do’s and dont's mainly). We also got a visit from the lactation consultant and Liam’s pediatrician, Dr. McCune who were all so kind and helpful. Liam had been struggling to latch and suck (likely do to him being late pre-term) so we were feeding him with a breast shield syringe contraption they call SNS (supplemental nursing system) and donor breastmilk which I was so thankful for since it takes 3-5 days for your own milk to come in.

On day two, Liam finally had his first bath after two successful feedings, he hated every second of it, but I’m glad they could finally get all the crusty dried up goop off his hair, his body was surprisingly clean already from the blanket, which I had my sister take home to Chip so he could get familiar with the babies scent.

As good as the free meals and cable were, we were so ready to get out of there by day two. What made the whole experience really come full circle for us was that the midwife who discharged was the same midwife who confirmed our pregnancy the first time we went to the clinic back on July 5th, 2019. It was so special to have her see that little bean that we first saw on the ultrasound now a full-grown baby boy, it was so special! We were greeted at our home with a sign in our yard courtesy of my sister, “It’s A Boy!” It was the cutest and we were just so happy to be together at home as a family of three (four if you count Chip!)